5 Tips for a Stress-free Newborn Session

I never really knew anxiety until I had my son. I thought I was a pretty laid-back lady, prided myself on being “low-maintenance” and naively thought I’d be able to carry that “no worries chic” into parenthood without any worries.

Then I had a baby, my first successful delivery after a mountain of failed tries and a high-risk pregnancy, and out came my boy with a cord around his neck, pulling all of my pushed-down anxiety out with him.

I was anxious about everything. Our newborn photography session was no exception. Would I need to feed him during our session? We had feeding issues and I was a first-time mom who wasn’t comfortable sharing those issues, or my boobs, with a photographer I’d never spoken to. Would he blow out during our session? I had exactly one adorable outfit I wanted photos of him in, and it was white, of course. I wanted everything to go perfectly, needed these photos to be beautiful, and the lack of control was really stressing me out.

The morning of our session, I timed a painful feeding and quick wardrobe change down to the minute that our newborn photographer was supposed to arrive for our session. I wanted my boy to be full, sleepy, and clean. And then she didn’t arrive. My anxiety mounted as I paced back and forth between the front door and living room, where he was dozing lightly, the clock ticking on that full belly. When she finally arrived, I was at a 9 on the anxiety scale, and our session was a fog of my son crying for some unknown reason (I know why now, more on that below) and me just wanting it to be over. The anxiety of this stranger judging me in my new parent role was palpable.

I’ve talked before about what I learned as a newborn photography client, including how to show up to a session on time so I don’t add to a new parent’s anxiety. But what can you do, as the client, leading up to your newborn session? How can you lessen the stress of newborn photos?

Here are five tips:

Plan what you can plan.

These things are all within your control:

• Schedule your session for a date that works for your family, based on leave schedules and everyone’s health (don’t worry, I’ll walk you through this if you’re not sure).

• If you have grandparents or other relatives staying with you to help with newborn transitions, consider inviting them to be part of your session, for part of the time.

• Fill out the client questionnaire, which will help me know what you want, and also will help you know what I’m looking for before I come.

• Have backup outfits for everyone who will be photographed, because you know something will come out, somewhere.

• Dress comfortably (fuzzy socks are allowed) and be prepared for feedings, however you plan to do those.

• Open shades and blinds to let the light in, turn up the thermostat so the baby isn’t cold, and otherwise, read the prep guide I send you so you’re not surprised when I show up and ask for a tour of your home.

Release what you can’t control.

So much of newborn life is realizing that you have no control over most things now. Even when and how you eat, sleep, and go to the bathroom is out of your control now. Your body is in repair mode, while also trying to provide for a new human, and you’re in full-on survival mode. So, release what you can’t control. Know that you’ll need to feed, burp, change, and comfort your baby, sometimes multiple times, during your session, and that’s okay. If you want photos of feedings, we’ll keep the camera out and keep going while you breast or bottle feed. If you don’t, I’ll set the camera down and give you time to feed.

Embrace the chaos, forget perfection.

It’s hard when you go from having no babies to suddenly having a baby. There’s a certain amount of chaos that appears as you try to figure out a schedule and then realize there is no schedule, and you’re at the whims of a days-old human being. If you have more than one child, the subsequent babies become a little easier because the chaos mindset is already there, but the chaos escalates with each small person you add to a session. Your older child(ren) may have trouble adjusting to a baby (more tips on that here) and they may need additional attention, even though this is a newborn session. That’s okay! The goal of our session is to get beautiful images of your newest baby, while also documenting your family as it is right now. Perfection does not equal “zero tantrums.”

Trust that the story we tell together will be beautiful.

You’re the one in it, getting whiplash from being needed so very much all the time, still sporting a post-pregnancy body, and feeling so sleep-deprived. Your baby is crying every 15 minutes, it feels like, and you wonder just how it’s possible that we’re getting any photos at all during our session. But you can’t see what I’m seeing through the camera. I’m not being quiet because I’m judging (because I’m definitely not judging); I’m quiet to let the scene unfold. I’m pausing to let you take a deep breath, to get settled down into a cloud of pillows and burp cloths so you can comfortably nurse your baby, who will then fall asleep on your breast. (Please let me take some photos of that, btw. You’ll thank me later.) The story we tell together - your story - will be beautiful.

Let’s chat.

Part of the reason I was so anxious about our session way back then, was because I’d only communicated with our photographer over email a couple of times. I had never talked with her on the phone, I didn’t know anything about her until the actual session, and I worried that this baby expert would be judging me based on her experience with other babies. Of course, if I’d talked to her ahead of time, that would have cleared up a lot of things, and maybe would have given her the opportunity to ask where my house was so she wasn’t 10 minutes late to our session. Anyway. My point is, you can’t get a good feel for a person through email. There’s nuance and tone that is important when talking to a new human, especially one that you’re inviting into your home to meet your baby and photograph an intimate, important moment in your life. Talking on the phone is awful and it raises my own stress levels every time. But I still insist on it, because it’s the best way to get to know new clients and let you get to know me.

So there, five tips for a stress-free newborn photo session. Embrace the rollercoaster that is lack of control, plan what you can, and release the rest.

Want to see more newborn photography examples from past sessions? I got you:

Click here for one from Chesterfield with a furry sibling.

Click here for one from North Side with a blended family and pre-teen.

Click here for one from Midlo where the baby was less than a week old.

Click here for one where the baby was 30 days old, and some tips on how to decide when to schedule your own session.

And if you’re ready to talk about your own newborn photography needs, you can start that conversation here.